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1
识别冲动思绪。有策略地抵制当前的冲动是训练自控力的办法之一。列出你想要控制的行为和触发该行为的情境。[1]X研究来源“Self-Control, Willpower, and the Problem of Diminished Motivation.” Connor, Thomas. Philosophical Studies. Apr2014, Vol. 168 Issue 3, p783-796. 14p[2]X研究来源“Why Didn't I Think of That? Self-Regulation through Selective Information Processing.” Trudel, Remi; Murray, Kyle B. Journal of Marketing Research (JMR). Aug2011, Vol. 48 Issue 4, p701-712. 12p. 当你意识到自己的冲动行为是在什么情况下发生的,你就可以延缓冲动。
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3
尝试腹式呼吸。这个方法对戒烟和纠正饮食习惯比较有效。当你想抽烟或吃零食时,在手机上定时五分钟,用这段时间进行腹式呼吸。提醒自己是嘴馋而不是真正的饥饿。想像每一次呼气时都排解了一些欲望。关注自己的感受,五分钟后再看看是否还想抽烟或吃零食。[3]X研究来源“Revisiting the Restorative Effects of Positive Mood: An Expectancy-Based Approach to Self-Control Restoration.” Egan, Patrick M.; Clarkson, Joshua J.; Hirt, Edward R. Journal of Experimental Social Psychology. Mar2015, Vol. 57, p87-99. 13p.
闭上眼睛,慢慢地用鼻子呼吸。让空气充满肺部、胸部和腹部。最后,慢慢地自然地呼气,用嘴或鼻子呼气都可以。[4]X
可靠来源
Harvard Medical School
前往来源
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5
参与活动。比暂时的转移注意力更进一步的方法是参与另一项有意义的活动,来抵消做某事的冲动。这也是延缓冲动的做法,让自己有更多时间理性地决定。[5]X研究来源“Revisiting the Restorative Effects of Positive Mood: An Expectancy-Based Approach to Self-Control Restoration.” Egan, Patrick M.; Clarkson, Joshua J.; Hirt, Edward R. Journal of Experimental Social Psychology. Mar2015, Vol. 57, p87-99. 13p.
比如,你不想再乱花钱,你可以去没有商场的地方散散步。如果你想控制食欲,每次想吃零食时就去健身吧。
方法 2 的 2:
提高长远的自控能力
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1
列出你想控制的习惯或行为。假如生活中有人对你提出建议,你应当考虑一下。但是真正的改变源于内心,所以在听取他人反馈的同时也要追寻自己的内心。只有下决心做出改变、提高自控力才能真正改变你的行为。[6]X研究来源“Self-Control, Willpower, and the Problem of Diminished Motivation.” Connor, Thomas. Philosophical Studies. Apr2014, Vol. 168 Issue 3, p783-796. 14p
需要控制的行为包括:吸烟、饮食、工作习惯、效率、喝酒、脾气、购物开支等。
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2
从上一步所做的列表中选择一项主要的行为。我们都有很多方面需要改进,但应该循序渐进慢慢来。从列表中选择一项。改变习惯需要时间,提高自控力需要努力。根据自身精力,合理分配时间,设定可达成的实际的目标。[7]X研究来源“Revisiting the Restorative Effects of Positive Mood: An Expectancy-Based Approach to Self-Control Restoration.” Egan, Patrick M.; Clarkson, Joshua J.; Hirt, Edward R. Journal of Experimental Social Psychology. Mar2015, Vol. 57, p87-99. 13p.
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3
调查行为。通过搜索和调查的方式,了解和你处境相似的人是如何提高自控力的。如果你的朋友和亲人有过类似经历,也可以请教他们。在网上详实地调查,为你的改变做准备。[8]X研究来源“Why Didn't I Think of That? Self-Regulation through Selective Information Processing.” Trudel, Remi; Murray, Kyle B. Journal of Marketing Research (JMR). Aug2011, Vol. 48 Issue 4, p701-712. 12p.
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4
诚实对待自己。写一本私人日记,记录你每天发生的改变。通过日记意识到你的情绪触发点,是什么使你冲动和失控。培养对自身行为和情绪的认知,会帮助你提高自控能力,让你做出更明智的决定。对自己的冲动情绪形成清醒的认知,这是提高自控能力的前提。[9]X研究来源“Why Didn't I Think of That? Self-Regulation through Selective Information Processing.” Trudel, Remi; Murray, Kyle B. Journal of Marketing Research (JMR). Aug2011, Vol. 48 Issue 4, p701-712. 12p.
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5
设定切合实际的目标。很多人失败是因为急于求成和过早放弃。成功不可能一蹴而就,你应该设定切实可行的目标和计划,慢慢地改正坏习惯。[10]X研究来源“Why Didn't I Think of That? Self-Regulation through Selective Information Processing.” Trudel, Remi; Murray, Kyle B. Journal of Marketing Research (JMR). Aug2011, Vol. 48 Issue 4, p701-712. 12p.
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8
把精力有效地转化为积极行为。尝试不同方法来改正坏习惯,提高自控力。不断探索适合自身的方式,别因为偶尔的失败而沮丧。如果一种方法行不通,就再试试另一种。关心自己的感受,以积极的心态努力提高自控力。[12]X研究来源“Revisiting the Restorative Effects of Positive Mood: An Expectancy-Based Approach to Self-Control Restoration.” Egan, Patrick M.; Clarkson, Joshua J.; Hirt, Edward R. Journal of Experimental Social Psychology. Mar2015, Vol. 57, p87-99. 13p.
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10
自我提升。鼓励自己积极地做出改变,一步步接近理想生活。积极的心态能促进你提高自控力。就算一时无法达成目标也不要过于苛责自己。专注于不断努力和提高,别在意小小的失败。再尝试一次。[13]X研究来源“Yes, But Are They Happy? Effects of Trait Self-Control on Affective Well-Being and Life Satisfaction.” Hofmann, Wilhelm; Luhmann, Maike; Fisher, Rachel R; Vohs, Kathleen D.; Baumeister, Roy F. Journal of Personality. Aug2014, Vol. 82 Issue 4, p265-277. 13p.
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12
奖励自己。当你在改变行为和提高自控力方面取得阶段性进步,应该给予自己合理的奖励。这样能够加强积极性,帮助你进一步抵制冲动行为。[14]X研究来源“Self-Control and Impulsiveness in Adult Humans: Comparison of Qualitatively Different Consumable Reinforcers Using a New Methodology.” Forzano, L.; Michels, J.; Sorama, M.; Etopio, A.; English, E. Psychological Record. Dec2014, Vol. 64 Issue 4, p719-730. 12p.